


Adaptation

by AnotherWriterWhoWrites



Series: Reverse Verse [6]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Dean Winchester, Ex Demon Sam, Hunter Castiel, Hunter Gabriel, Mentions of Lilith, Mentions of other angels - Freeform, Prophet John Winchester, mentions of lucifer, reverse verse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-20
Updated: 2014-02-20
Packaged: 2018-01-13 05:33:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1214566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnotherWriterWhoWrites/pseuds/AnotherWriterWhoWrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam struggles to get used to being human, finally tells the Novak brothers about his past and who he once was, and ends up talking with the prophet John Winchester who might be a bit familiar to him than he first thought.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Adaptation

Sam was human and unconscious for a little over an hour until he started coughing up blood and his body jerked in a motion that the Novak brothers were unfortunately familiar with. 

Gabriel held Sam’s arms down while Castiel held his legs down. The longer and somewhat stronger limbs lurched out of their grips as his back arched and blood spewed from his mouth. His eyes were rolled back to the point that all they could see was the whites of his eyes and he gave gurgled screams.

Dean appeared then, most likely hearing the commotion from his customary guarding place outside and placed a hand on Sam’s forehead. Sam had frozen in place for a moment before he gave a low whimper and crumpled to the ground.

Dean took that moment to snap his fingers which caused the blood to disappear before he bent down and picked up the taller man and placing him gently on the motel bed. He stepped back and simply stared at the once demon before he glanced at his hand. 

“I was never able to heal him.” the angel said. He curled his fingers inward. “Angels aren’t supposed to be able to heal demons.”

“You said so yourself, he’s human now.” Castiel said sitting in the chair. He watched Dean carefully before he asked “Why is he human now?”

Dean shrugged. “Truth be told, I don’t know. I’m going to guess that he stopped Lilith.”

Lilith. The name still brought a chill up their backs. The painful reminder of what Castiel had almost done. They still didn’t remember how they got to their new motel room, part of Castiel thought that Dean had used his powers to get them there as soon as possible to get away from the church and all it stood for.

“Sam knew.” Gabriel said softly, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms. “He knew what killing Lilith would do.”

Castiel licked his lips. “Hence all of his training and having me drink his blood.”

“The both of you seem to be forgetting something.” Dean snapped at the two of them as he finally tore his gaze away from the sleeping ex-demon. “Sam also locked her away.”

The brothers locked eyes as they remembered the scene at the church before Sam collapsed. Gabriel let out a slow breath as he trailed his fingers through his hair. 

“‘We bind thee to hell once more’.” he repeated. “She’s in hell again?”

Dean nodded. “Bound in hell next to the cage that holds her daddy. They can hear each other scream for the rest of eternity.”

“She got out once before.” Castiel pointed out. “What’s stopping her this time?”

“‘I name thy guardians to thy crypt’.” Gabriel repeated once more. “Guards I suppose, who are they?”

“Samhana and Deanthral.” Castiel recited remembering the few hours ago. “Spells?”

Dean was shaking lightly however it wasn’t until the brothers heard suppressed giggles escaping him that they realized the angel was holding back laughter. 

“They’re names.” Dean said trying and failing to hold back his laughter. He bit his bottom lip and shook his head in mirth. “They’re our names.”

“Names?” Castiel repeated. 

“The closest versions of our names that can be pronounced using these human throats.” Dean said tapping his throat. “Human beings aren’t built to be able to talk in Enochian.” He nodded towards Sam. “Sammy here and I are the new guards to Lilith’s prison.”

“And what does the two of you being guards mean?” Gabriel asked. 

Dean looked to Sam again and reached out to trail his fingers through the unconscious man’s hair lightly. “It means that as long as we live no one can open her prison. If we die and everything is properly done, like it was this time, she can get free. As long as we live though, that won’t happen.”

Gabriel watched him carefully before he said “There’s one more part that I don’t understand from that chant you guys did.”

“Shoot.”

“‘Spoken by one who continues to stand in His presence.’” Gabriel recited noting how Dean tensed up. “That part I got.”

“But the first part.” Castiel said picking up from his brother and not able to keep his own curious tone out of his voice. “The part that Sam said.”

“‘Spoken by one who once stood in His presence’.” Gabriel watched Dean closely as the angel started to fidget and refused to look at either human. “What the hell does that mean?”

Dean was silent for a period of time that neither brother believed that he would answer until he quietly, so quietly they almost missed it, said “You know what it means.”

“I want to hear it from you.” Gabriel said stepping forward. “You never answered before and I didn’t push, everyone has secrets and all. But the time for secrets are done now. What the hell. Is Sam. To you?”

Dean watched at the brothers with a pained look in his eyes and when he glanced down at Sam and quickly blinked a few times Castiel was sure that he was trying to hold back his tears. 

He opened his mouth however whatever he was going to say was interrupted by Sam giving a low moan and opening his eyes.   
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Keeping Sam alive had become a main priority. 

Keeping Sam alive had become one of the biggest challenges that the brothers had to face next. 

Sam, who hadn’t been human since the time of Adam and Eve according to him, faced more trouble with his new found humanity than simply throwing up blood and seizures. 

The ex-demon knew nothing about being human. He had masqueraded as a human plenty of times and there were times when he had to hide his powers however they were always ready at his fingertips. To suddenly have nothing was a greater shock to him than anything. 

He didn’t seem to understand human beings and everything that made them tick despite having watched humanity since the beginning. He didn’t realize the pressure on his lower stomach meant he needed to go to the bathroom or that the grumblings of his stomach meant that he needed to eat. The first day he all but collapsed out of exhaustion because he seemed to forget that humans needed to sleep.

He had never ate as a demon, he had only ever drank alcohol and had the occasional piece of fruit or something small. He despised bitter and spicy food they discovered, or more appropriately he had rushed to the bathroom after biting into one of Gabriel’s handmade jalapeño sauce to empty his stomach. He seemed to enjoy salty and sweet things, at times together especially, and found the taste of beer disgusting. 

He also had no tolerance to drinking anymore which they discovered at a night at a bar when his eyes turned glassy and his words became slurred after drinking two glasses of whiskey, which to his relief tasted the same as before. 

He attempted to persist to wear his black clothes however they were too soon torn to shreds and had to borrow clothes from Castiel until they went shopping. Seeing Sam in the still small clothes made Gabriel laugh while Dean looked as if he wasn’t sure to laugh or cry. Later when Sam was clad in plaid and jeans he had looked at himself in the mirror and drew his hair back. His hands shook as he did and for a moment Gabriel was sure that he was going to punch the mirror.

Emotions became the biggest problem for Sam. As a demon emotions were hidden easier and unimportant. As a human, they were in the front and took one of the biggest meaning.

It had started with a simple mentioning of Lilith and Lucifer and how both father and daughter were now locked up and hopefully never getting out. A sniffling noise brought their attention to Sam who looked shocked and confused at the tears running down his face. 

He had ran out of the room as he pressed his hand to his face and attempted to hold the tears back. When Castiel went to him he admitted that he had no idea what was happening to him, that this never happened before, and was he dying tell him the truth. 

His pained look was replaced with a deeper pain when Castiel explained in his calm and low voice that Sam was crying and what crying meant.

Sam was thankful that he still had his fighting skills, even as a demon he made sure to know how to fight with his hands and various weapons. He joined the brothers on handling guns and quickly learned how to use one however he still held onto the angel blade.

What seemed to be the turning point and the true realization to himself that he was now completely human was when he cut himself sharpening a knife. He watched with almost fascination as the blood welled up and slowly slid down his palm. Dean reached to him and touched the back of his hand and the cut healed. 

Slowly Sam put his hand back on his lap and Castiel chanced a glance into his eyes. 

Sam’s eyes were filled with misery, pain, and the pure truth of realization. He was human.   
Demons didn’t seem to realize just what had happened. They knew and had been preparing for the return of Lucifer, their God they called him, and seemed simply confused. The signs had all been there. Lilith and Sam alike had spoken as Lucifer’s scribes and told them of his return. 

All they now knew was that Lucifer had not returned and was still locked in his cage that destroyed the open seals now that the final one hadn’t been broken. 

Gabriel made sure that Sam was properly hidden each time they had encountered a demon and Castiel quickly destroyed them. They didn’t bother with exorcisms or even thought of saving the poor bastards that the demons have taken as meat suits. Sam told them that when a demon was killed it wasn’t returned to hell, its mutilated soul was simply gone; as if it had never existed. 

They used the one demon killing knife they had each time. The times when the demon was captured and saw Sam standing beside them obviously human they had hissed and cursed at him in the language of the demons. 

They weren’t saying anything nice, Sam had later told them.

Word spread quickly through hell and demons everywhere soon realized just what had happened. Lucifer had almost been freed, Lilith had almost been killed and with her death the final seal would be destroyed. 

Every demon knew that Sam had stepped in. Sam the loyal son to Lucifer. Sam the second created by Lucifer’s own hands and grace. Sam had betrayed his blood, his father, his sister, and sided with the humans. He had helped to lock away Lilith and prevent the return of Lucifer. 

Sam who was one of the most well-known and feared demons. 

Sam who was now a guard to Lilith’s cage if only in name and protection through the use of his soul. Whose death would get rid of half the protection keeping Lilith locked. 

Sam who was now human and therefore vulnerable.

The day that Castiel realized that Sam didn’t have protection on him that would prevent a demonic possession he almost ran over half of the town’s people in his rush to get back to their motel in a panic. The only consolation was that their rooms were once again salted properly and would keep demons out. 

When he explained what the most recent cause of panic was and that they needed to get Sam tattooed immediately to protect him properly Sam looked to be on the verge of his own panic attack. To him, the thought of being possessed of one of the beings that he had commanded and had respected him and he had practically ruled over was enough for him to lose his temper for the moment. 

The only thing that kept him from storming from the room was that if he went outside he would no longer be protected by any demon that might be out there. 

Dean had marked his ribs as he had with Castiel and Gabriel to keep anyone from locating them however all the demons would have needed was one good stroke of luck. They knew to stay away from preachers on the streets, not even pay attention to them and try not to bring attention to themselves, however demons were an entirely different story. Anyone was able to be a demon and no one would be able to tell the difference.

Gabriel immediately located the closest tattoo parlor while Sam had gone to the bathroom. Only Castiel had seen him take the knife he carried.

An hour later Sam was sitting in the middle of the tattoo parlor and stoically watched as the artist carefully drew out the anti-possession on his wrist before getting the needle and filling it out. He had watched with hooded eyes as the artist finished his work and with light fingers traced the design. 

Later when he saw Sam attempted to bandage his side in the bathroom and went in to help him did he see that Sam had carved an anti-possession outline onto his side.   
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Dean was popping in every few days that he was able to, sometimes only for minutes at a time if only to ensure himself that the brothers and Sam were alive and well enough for their circumstances. He never stayed long and was gone within minutes if not seconds. 

And each time he popped in he looked worse and worse.

“He’s falling.” Sam told them. “He’s finally gone completely against heaven and its plan by helping me stop Lilith and now he’s paying the price.”

However it wasn’t until Dean had appeared in front of them and collapsed that they realized that the once angel was nearly human.

“The price of rebelling against heaven.” Sam had said shrugging as they moved the unconscious Dean to one of the beds. “Nothing anyone could really do now and no angel is willing to help him.”

“How pissed off is heaven right now?” Gabriel couldn’t help but ask.

Sam grinned almost wickedly at him. “Only the facts of the sigils on your ribs and that they are trying to put the apocalypse back on track and they need the two of you as vessels is really the only thing keeping the both of you alive at this moment.”

They surrounded Dean with hex bags and Sam wrapped bandages that had runes drawn on them around him that he swore were used to prevent location, seeing as none of them were able to make lasting marks on him at the moment without his knowledge. 

When Dean awoke he and Sam talked to one another quietly so that neither Gabriel nor Castiel would be able to hear them. Every so often Dean would reach out and simply stroke Sam’s arm, face, or hair as if to reassure himself that he was still there. 

By the third day Gabriel had had enough and he told the falling angel and the humanized demon so. 

“You guys and we are a team now.” he said through gritted teeth to Sam’s amusement. “Being on the same team means no more damn secrets.” He pointed at the both of them. “I want answer and I want them now.”

Dean and Sam shared a look. Sam shrugged and Dean frowned. 

“Answers regarding what?” Dean asked.

“The both of you.” Castiel said. He was sitting on a chair at the table, Sam and Dean were both sitting on the edges of the same bed, and Gabriel stood in front of the table. 

“Most of all, I want to know just what the hell you two were.” Gabriel said gesturing to the both of them. Sam and Dean shared another look. “He,” Gabriel said waving his hand to Dean. “Said you weren’t his charge but you were his responsibility. And you,” he pointed to Sam who raised his eyebrow. “You were so freaken special that Lucifer turned you into the first Archdemon. Why? Why the hell were you so special and how the hell were you his responsibility?”

Sam’s and Deans eyes connected once more. Dean looked lost for a moment before he quickly said “It’s all up to you.”

A corner of Sam’s lip lifted for a second. “You said that I was your responsibility?”

“Weren’t you?” Dean asked in response. He leaned forward until his elbows were balanced on his knees. “I definitely thought you were and I failed you.”

“Deanthral, taking responsibility.” Sam said softly. “Never thought I would see the day.”

Ignoring Deans sputtering Sam turned to face Gabriel. “Since he claimed that I was his responsibility, I will go from there.” He stood and walked to Gabriel. “And I’m sure you know what that means, Gabriel.”

Gabriel frowned. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“Think.” Sam said softly. “You have a brain and it is healthy to occasionally use it.” He walked around Gabriel who crossed his arms. “You tell me, what does it mean that he considered me to be his responsibility and yet he failed me?”

“You weren’t his charge, yet his responsibility.” Castiel said slowly. “You two have known each other since before Lucifer fell?”

Sam nodded. “Put the pieces together, just like a puzzle. What does it come up with?”

When Castiel opened his mouth, either to ask another question or say something else, Sam held up his hand. 

“I want Gabriel to speak. Only him.” he said watching the man carefully. “What do you think Gabriel?”

“I think you’ve been bullshitting us since day one.” Gabriel said glaring at Sam. 

Sam, to their surprise, chuckled lightly. “Besides that.” He leaned against the table and watched Gabriel. “Another being, other than yourself, that you consider your responsibility. That if something happened to them you would feel like you failed them. Knowing one another since practically creation. In your own words, who is that to you?”

Gabriel’s eyes immediately went to Castiel. Both brothers’ eyes widened at the implication. 

“No.” Castiel whispered.

Sam smiled and looked to Dean who smiled back at him. 

“Yes.” Sam said simply. He then brought his hands to his opened shirt and pulled it over his head before doing the same to the shirt underneath. Once his chest was bare he turned so that his back was to the brothers. 

Two scars; long, deep, and faded, which started from his shoulder blades going to the middle of his back. 

Almost as if something big had been cut off of him a long time ago.

“No fucking way.” Gabriel managed to push out. “You were…a fucking…”

“Angel.” Sam said nodding. He slid his shirts back on and threw a smile at both brothers. “I was once an angel of the lord.”

“Samhana.” Dean added. “The angel of law and justice.”

“Irony, in all reality.” Sam said. “Taking into the factors that lead to my expulsion from heaven.”

Gabriel felt his legs give out. Castiel, thankfully seeing his brother’s condition quickly brought him to the other free chair. Sam took his place beside Dean once more. 

“Tell us everything.” Castiel requested from the pair. “Please.”

The corners of Sam’s lips lifted once more. “Well.” he said amused. “Since you said please. Very well.”  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
“First there were the archangels: Adam, Lucifer, Raphael, and Charlie. And then came the angels in descending order, the older you were the stronger and more power you had over the younger. Dean and I were created hours after one another, something he never let me forget. Our bond was great, stronger than almost every other angelic relation any other hand perhaps excluding Adam and Lucifer of course.”

“Back then the two of us were among the youngest angels, the weakest and the only ones born in the hours together, we grew together and there was nothing more I had wanted than to learn and grow as strong as my big brother who protected and loved me. Our relationship was one of pure love for one another and complete devotion.”

“Everything changed however when the archangels decreed that they would be taking apprentices. That they themselves would teach and guide a single angel each. You can imagine the rampage it caused. Angels were suddenly overcome with the need to surpass other angels and to show that they deserved to be chosen.”

“I can’t think that I know what Deanthral was thinking during that time. I have no doubt that he wished to be chosen, the honor to be chosen by an archangel was great, but he never did anything out of the ordinary and strive to appear better than the others. Perhaps that is what he was counting on for him to get chosen. Myself? I played with the notion to be chosen before I decided that I wouldn’t be, I was one of the youngest and weakest after all and there was nothing I could truly give. I knew my title, the angel of law and justice, however I wouldn’t simply get it because it was mine. I had to work for it and I placed all of my attention on obtaining my title. I stayed in our libraries and focused on learning and practiced my growing powers with Dean.”

“Then, one day as I was studying. Lucifer came to me.”

“You need to understand. The concept of Lucifer the fallen, Lucifer the Devil, Satan. Those are all human-made concepts. Lucifer, during his time as an angel, was the Morningstar, the light bringer. He brought light into darkness, his beautiful voice pierced through all sounds. There is a reason he was Gods trusted, and it can be argued that he was Gods most beloved. He was beloved by all angels, mixing the perfect amount of sternness of being the elder brother, the tolerance and patience of a loving being, and most of all the gentleness of one who would protect the others to his last dying breath.”

“I could barely look up at him or even speak without stumbling over my words when he approached me. Throughout our entire conversation he was kind, patient, and he easily soothed me so that I would be able to speak to him without hesitation. He had asked me about my studies, what I thought of our brothers, my title.”

“By the end of the day the angels that had been chosen to be apprenticed were chosen. Charlie had chosen an angel called Krissy. Raphael had chosen an angel called Bela. Adam had chosen Dean. Lucifer had chosen me.”

“Archangels are thus for a reason, they are the most powerful, the only ones to have seen the face of God. Being taught by Lucifer was, in your terms, a dream come true. He taught me more than I could ever learn in books and even experiences. He taught me to control my grace and use it in ways that I had never even imagined. Through him I learned how to create a corporal form that would last for hours if not days, an act given only to the archangels might I add. He taught me to fight properly and use all my means to my advantage. He taught me to sing the oldest of songs and helped me to compose new ones.”

“And then God created human beings.”

“I immediately noticed the difference between the day before human beings were created and the day after. Firstly, God had created the beautiful earth full of life and wonder. He allowed angels to place their own marks on the new world. Some created plants that would bloom in vibrant colors. Some created the more dangerous plants. Some formed islands and others formed the shape of the waters. Later on animals were created and some were allowed to create those as well. Lucifer himself brought the sun, stars, and moon together and shined light onto the newly formed creation.”

“The day that human beings were created, however, the first man named for the first archangel Adam, and Lilith God told us to love the human beings. Love them more than we loved Him. I admit that I was confused, how could He wish such a thing? I was hesitant however it was an order from him so I followed it.”

“Until I approached Lucifer and I could see his fury and anger. At the human beings. At our father. At everything. In a rage he told me everything that he thought of them and all that he believed. Human beings are inferior and flawed little insects that had no right to be on the perfect creation that our father had done. What were they and why should we love them more than we love our father? He looked down at the newly created human beings and saw nothing more than pests that needed to be eliminated. They are flawed and don’t deserve to live, simple as that.”

“And then Lilith escaped from the garden when she refused to lie under Adam during sexual intercourse. Lucifer and I watched the entire scene and it was then that for the first time Lucifer and I went to earth and walked its soil together.”

“We approached Lilith, she was still in a rage and filled with anger. When Lucifer offered to help her she had grinned and said yes.”

“She would be the first demon ever created. Lucifer took her anger and her rage, he took every negative emotion she had and brought it to the front of her being. She allowed it, she had watched the entire process with open and eager eyes. She watched her own soul become corrupted and laughed when her body cracked and split open. Lucifer used his own grace to help create her, to give her the powers that demons would come to know and use.”

“I offered my own grace in turning her. My grace and Lucifer’s were mixed and painted together a new creature. Lucifer had called it the true form of humanity and the first demon was created.”

“We returned to heaven soon after. Lilith was immediately placed in hell, her new form wouldn’t survive without the power of hell coursing through her and there were no other humans for her to possess just yet. The moment we entered heaven once more we were taken as prisoners.”

“Lucifer spoke for the both of us. I was his apprentice and therefore I only did as he wished, he knew there would be a punishment for our actions but he intended to be the only one punished. He wanted to protect me.”

“In the end, however, he was an archangel; above all the others, and I was a mere angel; plenty more where they come from. Lucifer would be given a second chance, I was the one to be punished.”

“My grace was taken from me and my wings were cut off. I was being held down and couldn’t move, especially not when for all purposes I was no longer an angel. I was able to see Dean trying to get to me and being held back and I could hear Lucifer screaming for me. I was then pushed out of heaven and fell to the earth.”

“I had become human.”

“Lucifer came to me as soon as he was able to. He apologized for what had happened to me and wished to make things right, or as right as he was able to. He offered to perform what we had done to Lilith, the only change that would be is that due to my soul that had once been angel it was still stronger than one of a human and therefore my new human body would be able to withstand the transformation and wouldn’t be destroyed as Lilith’s was.”

“I was angry and betrayed and in pain of all sorts; mental, emotional, physical. I eagerly accepted his proposal and swore my loyalty to him. He told me that my transformation is based on one thing and is the only thing holding me to both him and my new status: my loyalty to him. If I was ever disloyal, if I ever went against him, I would immediately and painfully lose whatever power he had given me and I would return to being human. I swore to him that I would never betray him, I was still his apprentice and I would do as he wished.”

“He turned me into an Archdemon, the first and only. When it was done he was immediately recalled back to heaven and his own punishment was finally placed. He was imprisoned in the cage and the only reason I wasn’t was because he had told me to hide in hell properly before he had left. I stayed there for a few centuries to get used to new powers and status. It also gave enough time for the humans to get kicked out of paradise and being to populate the earth. Together Lilith and I turned humans into demons while the angels in heaven stewed over our acts, however they never stopped us. Lilith was eventually imprisoned in hell and so I continued to create and train new demons alone.”

“After my forced eviction from heaven I never saw another angel again, until Dean called me a month ago. Because this was my own body from the beginning it still grew, when I had fallen I was in the form of a child. I have watched humanity grow and expand, I have watched them rise in sin and fall by virtue and vice versa. I have seen empires collapse and I have watched countless bloodshed.”

“I was an Archdemon and I was the loyal son to my father. I was an Archdemon and I performed every last wish my father had given to me. I am a fallen angel and I have betrayed the only one that had helped me in my time of need.”

Sam finally stopped and looked up at the shocked faces of the Novak brothers. 

“So. Any questions?”  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A few days after Sam told them about his past and his story and his relationship with Dean they received a call from the prophet John Winchester.

“All of a sudden nothing is happening like I saw it.” his slightly panicking voice said through the phone. “What the hell have you guys done?”  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Sam stumbled through the hallway as he made his way to the living room. He noted however paid no attention to the prophet who sat at his desk typing on his computer. He could feel the other man’s eyes on him as he reached the drinking cabinet and pulled out a bottle of whiskey and a glass which he filled and tipped back into his mouth.

“You’re going to kill your liver if you continue.” John said quietly as he closed his computer and stood. He walked to the front of the desk and leaned against it with his hands at his sides. 

Sam swallowed his next mouthful and gave a snort. “Death by failed liver, classy.”

John shrugged. “You’re human now, you need to be careful about these things.”

Sam shook his head as he refilled his glass and drained half of it. “Mind your own business, how I handle this is my problem.”

The prophet held his hands up in innocence for moment before bringing them down. “Just giving some friendly advice.”

Sam gave another snort around the glass as he gripped the bottle and turned to face John.

“The infamous prophet of the lord.” Sam said. His head spun as he thought out loud. “I’m pretty sure I’ve killed a prophet once.”

John didn’t say anything as he simply watched the ex-demon refill his glass.

“No.” Sam suddenly said shaking his head. “I didn’t kill a prophet. I killed a man pretending to be a prophet.” He seemed to think to himself before he nodded as if confirming to himself the truth. 

“Why did you kill him?” John asked quietly.

Sam swayed in place and he glanced at the still half full bottle in his hand as if debating to keep drinking. In the end he shrugged and refilled his glass. “He made me mad.”

“How?”

“He was pretending to be a prophet.” Sam said slowly as if explaining to a child. “That made me angry.”

John looked like he was fighting a smile. “So you killed him because he was pretending to be a prophet. Why would that have made you angry?”

Sam started to look annoyed. “Why the hell do you want to know so badly?” he snapped. “Don’t you have prophet duties to take care of?”

“I’m all done for the night.” John said shrugging. He stretched his legs in front of him and crossed his ankles. 

Sam gave a snort as he leaned against the wall and slid down it until he was sitting on the floor. He lifted his glass and watched the dim light shine through. “Human beings are so pitiful.”

“How so?”

“There really is no point to your little lives.” he said. He shifted the glass left and right. “What is your purpose?”

“To live.” John said simply. He watched Sam closely. “You’re human now, are you saying that you don’t feel anything?”

“I feel everything.” Sam said through gritted teeth. “I still remember my past lives as an angel and a demon, emotions meant nothing. Now,” he said in disgust as he motioned to himself. “Now I feel too much.”

“That’s humanity.” John said quietly. “That’s what it means to be human.”

“I don’t want to be human!” Sam exclaimed jerking his arm. Thankfully his glass was empty. “I don’t want this!”

“Is that the reason for the drinking?” John said motioning with his head to the bottle still in Sam’s hand. “Trying to kill yourself?”

Sam snorted as he flexed his fingers around the bottle. “I know where I’m going, sin of suicide aside, and I’m not looking forward to my time on the rack, although it means I’ll be able to become a demon again much faster, but when I die that leans Dean as the sole guardian to guard Lilith from escaping. He has his own problems with falling from heaven.” He stopped and nodded to himself. “Won’t be fair to leave him but we’ve got no choice.”

John was smiling lightly again. “You really do love Dean.” It wasn’t a question.

“He’s my brother.” Sam said simply. “Even more so since he’s slowly becoming human.”

John tilted his head to the side, his eyes staring at Sam intensely. “Your time as a human, it hasn’t taught you anything?”

The word choice brought a frown to Sam’s face. He starred back at the prophet as he brought his glass to his lips and slowly drank once more. “Why do you want to know?”

“Indulge me.” John said crossing his arms. 

The look in Sam’s eyes darkened as he slowly stood on his shaking legs, gripping the bottle and glass tightly. 

“No.” he said rolling his neck and shoulders. “I think I’ll go back to bed. Humans need sleep after all.”

He walked past John who gave a disappointed sigh. Body moving sluggishly Sam started to leave the room. 

“Samhana.” John said quietly causing Sam to freeze. “After all this time, you’ve still learned nothing.”

His heart pounding in his chest and clearly audible in his ears as he slowly turned around, the area on his back where his wings had been ripped off erupted in pain. John walked slowly towards Sam, his entire demeanor changing with each step until they were standing a few inches away and his true aura was visible to even Sam’s dim human eyes. 

“Dad.” Sam whispered. 

His father smiled sadly and placed his hands into his pockets. “Hello son.”


End file.
